{allanmia.com}

The baby feels like she's run out of space. Sometimes she'll push out really hard and it hurts. She kicked me once and I almost dropped what I was drinking! There are times when I just can't wait to see what she looks like and I want to hold her, but then I think about the freedom that I have right now and I want to hold on to these days too. I wish I could move around and do more things before baby's born but all I want to do these days is lie down and do absolutely nothing. I can barely get myself up the stairs now. My whole body feels weak.

I worry that I'll be messed up after labor just like I was with Aidan. I worry about breastfeeding. I worry about having the time for Aidan to get him ready, drive him and pick him up from school (because all of those things combined takes up 3 hours of my day). Allan will be available to help me in the beginning and then once he gets his car he plans to be the one to take Aidan to school everyday. That relieves me of a big burden so I guess I shouldn't worry too much. What I've been doing alot lately is hugging and kissing Aidan. I still can't get enough of my first baby.

This weekend we'll be looking for a condo for my Mom and my brothers. It's hard to look for housing these days when hardly anything is affordable anymore but there's certain criteria that have to be met. I read somewhere that this year would be all about balance. There'll be both difficult and fruitful times and it's been so true this year with my family. Hopefully next year everything will settle down.